A parody real estate website, www.reallyrottenrealty.com, is making the rounds of the blogosphere. It's actually a very clever marketing tool for a real estate agent referral network, Agent Harvest. Nonetheless, it's quite funny and would be downright hilarious if there weren't so many grains of truth sprinkled about. Some of my favorite quotes:
From the Buy A Home section:
Looking for a home with specific qualities?
We will work with you to find out what you are looking for in a home,
then we'll show you the homes we wanted to show you before we pretended
to care about you.
Worried about wasting time seeing homes that don't meet your criteria?
We aren't worried. We'll show you all of the homes that our agency is
listing, whether they fit your criteria or not, so we can try to force
you to buy one of our homes so we can keep all the commission for
ourselves. If there's time left over, we'll show you a few homes in the
market that actually meet your criteria.
From the Sell A Home section:
Want your house advertised by a professional?
Look
elsewhere. We don't advertise in the newspaper, magazines or promote
our listings on the Internet. It's just too expensive and way too much
work for a Really Rotten agent to deal with. We believe in the 3-P's of
real estate marketing: Put, Put and Pray. Put a sign in the yard, Put it on MLS and then Pray
someone will come along and buy it. We usually find that after enough
time passes, and after several price drops the house usually sells
itself without too much intervention from us. That's an easy commission
earned. We like easy.
We're just a phone call away.
We
know you want to hire an agent that is easily reachable by phone.
That's why our voicemail is available 24/7. Our auto-attendant
automated phone menu system has over 57 menu options available for your
convenience. We hope you'll take the time to hear all 57 of them.
You'll also love our extensive collection of on-hold music selections.
There are a couple of dozen more gems like these on the site. Check it out.
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